Love of a Lifetime

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http://www.jonandholl.blogspot.com/

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Thank you.

Love,
Hollie

I am human and I am wasteful.

Have you ever felt like you are missing something? Was there something you should have done, something you should have said, should you have held onto a moment for longer than you did? This feeling has come over me several times and it’s a hard one to shake. Its like from your earliest memory to where you are now the events in my life surround me and run past me in panoramic view. I can see being a little girl-holding my Daddy's hand while he takes me trick-or-treating, to my teenage quirks and mistakes (or lessons) that have lead me to where I am now. To pivotal moments with my loved ones, moments I’ve lived and would re-live a thousand times over if I could. It’s an overwhelming thought to think about how quickly your life slips through your fingers. Moments come and then they are taken away. Something shattering and life altering could happen to me tomorrow and what would I remember? Would I have done everything in my power to make the days I’ve lived worth while? My mother recently shared with me that a dear friend of hers has been given his last six weeks to live; like I said a few sentences above I’ve felt these emotions towards my life before but when she told me that something clicked. If I were told I had six weeks to live I would ____________ (fill in the blank). Flip out and completely lose myself? That’s the first thing that comes to my mind. Instinct. I can’t tell you what I’d do. You could say I’m grateful-when my life experiences envelope my mind I see beauty. But this is the unanswered question I ask, have I seen? Did I revel in what I was created for, my purpose? It feels almost like time has rushed by and I haven’t had the chance to see. Let me go back and pick up the things I left behind that I should have kept hidden in the box that I call my very own. What moment placed itself right before my very eyes that I completely missed? I want to know. I am human and I am wasteful. I’m always pushing for tomorrow, but what about today? I ask myself all these questions but I have yet to find an answer. I cannot be told, I can only find them. I have seen beauty-golden fields of grain, friendship, green mountaintops so high, never ending rivers going to places they only know about, a child being born, a family so close, the sun shining in my wondrous eyes, the warmth of it on my skin, love, and loss. I fear that I will forget. This nervous thought that I’ve missed something important is triggered in me at the most random of times. I wish I knew, so I could change tomorrow. What am I missing?

Summer 2010 Update

Summer is whizzing by! I can't believe we are nearing the end of July. Jon and I have been enjoying our summer and keeping busy. It has been the best possible year, I couldn't ask for anything greater from our relationship right now. We had a blast on our week getaway to Bear Lake and Jackson Hole over the 4th and after. Now we are taking a break and spending time working around the house. Last weekend we refinished our deck and it looks awesome! I planted some herbs and flowers that look so cute around our house. One day I'll have a big enough yard for a huge garden! We are counting down the days until our Lake Powell trip in September and really just couldn't be happier.

Spending time with eachother, our family, and loved ones is the ultimate best. Happy summer!

Independence!

I hope everyone enjoys their holiday weekend with family and friends; have a safe and memorable time!

Happy Fourth of July!

My 1st business trip in HELL

You think I'm kidding, but I literally went to hell.
Monday I embarked on a business trip for Delta Faucet Company to Carmel, Indiana. Everything was going well until we were nearly a few minutes from landing at the Indianapolis airport; the pilot got on and said "We have been informed they closed the airport for landing due to thunder storms at this time, we have enough fuel to circle the aiport for 45-50 minutes until we get further notice." My heart sank, it had already been a 2 1/2 hour flight and I was exhausted. It was already a late flight, I was supposed to arrive in Indy at 11:56p.m. So we of course circled the airport for about 45 minutes and then the pilot got on again and said, "We are still unable to land at the airport, we are making our way down to Louisville, Kentucky to get some fuel." At that point it was 1:00am, we landed in Kentucky and they wouldn't let us off the plane. There was a coughing child behind me as well as a little girl and her Grandma who wouldn't stop singing the ABC's and loud. Not only was I claustrophobic but I had had it by now. Half an hour later we got the news from the pilot that we were okay to land in Indy so we took off from Kentucky and landed around 2:00am. There was a driver holding a card with my name on it there to take me to the hotel which was...an hour away. I didn't crawl into the hotel bed until 3:30 in the morning; I had to be up for training at 8:30. I spent six hours in training the next day (listening to someone lecture for hours on end is never entertaining), was fed a mediocre lunch and that was it. By the time we arrived at the restaurant for dinner I was starving but also extremely nauseated, I figured the nausea was only food deprivation so I choked down my fetticini which was a ...mistake. I got back to the hotel room and threw up within maybe a half hour. I needn't go into detail but I spent the night on the bathroom floor-I had nothing left in my body; and another sleepless night to boot. I was sure I had to of gotten food poisoning, but after what happened next I think it was the stomach flu. I had to be up at 6am for training, I could barely stand to get ready. I kept having to do one thing at a time and then go lay back down, I was so weak and still so nauseated. After walking outside in the 94% humidity I didn't know how I was going to make it through the day. My glasses actually fogged up, that's how humid it was. Another five hours in training and of course not long after arriving the worst fever in the world came on. My body ached like it never had before, I thought I was going to shatter! Having no meds, I had to suffer through the fever aches and pains the entire time. I left for the airport at 1:00, I go up to check in and get my tickets, and the lady says, "Your flight is delayed due to tornado warnings and at this point it looks like you are going to miss your connection. Your connection is the last flight out of Milwaukee this evening so you might not have a flight until Thursday morning." Body aching, emotions rising, I felt so defeated at that point. If it wasn't one thing after another on this trip! It seems as though everything went wrong. I just said, "ok." turned, walked away and the tears started flowing. Security even confiscated the can of Pepsi I had stowed away in my purse for my upset stomach! Bastards! My options were A: to get on the delayed flight and hope that I could make my connection in the ten minutes they had allotted, or B: to get on the delayed flight, miss my connection and spend the night at the airport in Milwaukee. Get this I was the last person on the connecting flight from Milwaukee to Denver. That's how close it was, I got off the plane and ran to the gate. I felt like Kevin on Home Alone. The flight to Denver wasn't bad, I was able to get some rest and read my book. I was still nauseated so I asked for some sprite to ease my stomach. I arrived in Denver and had a two hour layover, I found a corner and layed on the floor. After the longest 72 hours of my life I arrived in SLC at 10:30p.m...proceeded to get on the wrong shuttle that was going to the wrong parking lot and wasted another twenty minutes of my life on this trip. Finally I got on the right shuttle, got to my car and got home to Jon & my puppies at midnight.

After everything I went through, I came home to this waiting for me:

On the counter was what Jon called my gift of relaxation (hallelujah!). Sweet smelling body soap, the softest loufa known to man, cucumber melon & green tea dove soap, stress & tension relief bath crystals (I had plenty of both!), juicy grape smelling body fizzer ball, & last but not least my favorite flavor of Grandma Sycamore's cookies-fudge chocolate chip. mmmm! To be enjoyed all at once would be dangerous! I carefully picked the coconut scrub, the bath crystals, and the softest loufa known to man. I've never had a better bath at 1 o' clock in the morning. I had to be at work this morning so it wasn't a long lived bath-but those crystals will last me awhile. He also left me this card, the inside caption read "...and still have my heart." He wrote the sweetest message inside and it left me feeling greatly missed and appreciated. Not only did I get all of this but the house was clean as well! Before I even left I was homesick, I missed my family and my home more than words while I was away. It felt like weeks, not only 2 1/2 days. Coming home to our beautiful Utah set a peace within my heart. Thank the Lord for the dry climate & our less than busy lifestyle. I could honestly feel the purity our state portrays in an instant. I am so grateful for everyone I have that I left behind these past few days. It's great having my family nearby and so close at heart.

The only positives from going away were working 47 hours in four days, losing five pounds (hooray for stomach flu!), and the glorious views from the planes (once I caught them). The first photo is of Lake Michigan, it was huge! There is nothing quite like soaring through a blanket of clouds, it's odd looking down on clouds and up at nothing but blue sky. The sun shining through the plane window put me to sleep.

Luckily I have tomorrow off, so I'm planning on spending the weekend catching up on some rest, slowly introducing food to my body again, in the yard, and with my family. Bliss.

80 hours and six flights later, I have returned from hell; it feels so great to be back.

Three years & counting...

Well J and I hit our three year anniversary mark, does that mean we aren't newlyweds anymore? I can honestly say that would make me happy-to me it would mean we made it over the biggest humps in any couple's experience. We have been through so much but it makes our time now so much sweeter. Nothing of true greatness is ever easy...that's what I keep telling myself! ;)

I have such an amazing husband; he is unique to me and to our relationship-that's all that really matters right? I suprised him with a night away the weekend following our actual anniversary ( June 8th ) up to Park City. We enjoyed the drive up, it is always beautiful-we were able to talk and listen to good music, we shopped around at some outlets and had a great dinner at The Red Rock Brewing Co. (try it!) We had a wonderful room at the luxurious Holiday Inn Express (splurging on a budget doesn't exist!) but the room was actually perfect, a jacuzzi suite! We enjoyed sleeping in Saturday morning and making open plans for the rest of our day. We ended up driving into SLC to the Gateway where we had lunch, continued to shop (sO lucky my husband enjoys shopping with me, he always has!) & saw The A-Team. I couldn't have asked for a better time. This anniversary was more special than the rest. I am truly hoping that by the time our next one rolls around that we will either be expecting or have a little one here already! My plan is to have one here already, but nothing ever goes the way it's supposed to so I'm leaving it in the Lord's hands and trying my anxious best to live with that. Needless to say, we had to get out of dodge for a minute to celebrate the last opportunity we may have with just the two of us.

Jon,
Thank you for all you have given me the last seven years of our fulfilling relationship. I am sorry for all the grief I have caused you in the past, but I hope you see that it was worth it to stick through to the end. We will have trials in our future, but I am forever confident that we can get through anything. I have the will to spend the rest of my life with you and I can only dream that you feel the same. (I have a pretty good idea!) I love the way we are together, to name a few-african dances in our kitchen, the endless variety of oddball nicknames we give our dogs and loved ones, & for the nights we set out to get to bed early but spend an hour or more talking and laughing about nothing in particular. I am so comfortable with you and I can't imagine being able to be me with anyone else. For that I am forever indebted to you. I won't get in to much of it because that is private and something that I only want you and I to share as a couple...but in a way this is a tribute to you. To my two readers...I am not afraid to express my love and devotion to my wonderful husband! That good enough for you, babe? ;)

To the last seven and the next 80 more, may we always have what we've gained up until this point.

All my love & forever yours,
Smabs

Meet our little Tula!

About a month ago Jon and I saw a puppy on KSL and acted spontaneously! Within an hour of seeing her online we had her in our arms. Tula would be child #3 for us and what a handful. She has been so much fun and we couldn't have picked a better time, we are getting new carpet in a couple of weeks! haha. At first Attika was reluctant, we'd notice her scuzzing us out of the corner of her eye-man that dog can sneer! But I've noticed the past few weeks that she is playful with Tula and that makes me happy. We took them both to the vet, Tu to get her second set of puppy shots & Atti to get caught up on parvo & rabies. The vet talked me into getting Atti spayed even though a surgery scares the hell out of me-he said it would be beneficial to her in the long run and that's all I can really hope for. Anyone who knows me knows that she means enormous amounts to me. I couldn't live without her, it's funny how pets can become the best of friends. He also said that getting a new dog was a good move-that having a puppy around would breathe new life into Ms. Atti, which I've noticed, and that made me happy too. She is only six years old and the vet said over and over that she isn't old but I couldn't help but get a little teary eyed in the veterinarian office just talking about her getting older. He also broke the news that she's 3lbs overweight-so she's currently on a diet and we're taking nightly walks around the neighborhood. I've just noticed that this post is supposed to be introducing Tula and I'm talking all about Atti!
We really do love the puppy, she is so funny already and I've seen quite the personality sprout from her thusfar. She is the perfect combination-she is playful and fun but she also is the greatest cuddler. I would reccommend a dacshund to anyone that was asking, they are a marvelous breed.

p.s. Wish us luck with the operation-we'll get both of them spayed eventually.

Denicio Del Toro

I don't think I've ever expressed how much I appreciate and love Denice (my mother-in-law). It seems like from day one we made a connection and have been close ever since. She means the world to me and I cherish our conversations the most. I lucked out in the m-in-law department because I consider her a great and close friend. There are times when I just truly miss her and need to go for a visit. (I bet she gets sick of me!) She has such a wonderful sense of humor and I love how open she can be with her children, she isn't afraid to say it and I freaking love that about her. There are some nights Jon and I go over there and we laugh for literally 3 hours long. We've shared a lot throughout the years with one another and I feel even closer to her now that I'm becoming more mature. Her Father passed away last October and I feel his passing has caused her to be spiritual and deep on different levels than she was before. I know she misses him but there isn't a single doubt in my mind that he isn't watching over her with a smile on his face. He raised one incredible daughter. It's a new side to her that I have really enjoyed exploring. The love she has for her children I find in Jon, and that is comforting. I hope to one day mimic some of her techniques when I have children of my own. I'm proud to be called her daughter in law and I'm not looking forward to sharing her with Ryan's one day wife either! (I'll always be her first child by marriage, so nobody can take that from me)I love her so much, I only hope she feels the same!

p.s. She's the babe in the middle. She is so gorgeous and has aged like a butterfly releasing from its cocoon! (inside joke, lol)